In Words..

I went to a nearby warung yesterday to get some Nescafe to survive the evening in the office and came across The Sun newspaper, and the big headline just caught my attention.

How many of us Malaysian are aware how crazily expensive cars are over here?? I don’t travel that much and i don’t read that much either… but i bet there are not many countries in the world that takes u 5-7 years to pay for an average car (some car loan stretch to 12 years now) !!

Let’s take Perodua MyVi as an example. Cost around RM40k here. Bare in mind, that this is one of our ‘National’ car.. which logically, should be fairly affordable to Malaysian rite?? I’m not sure whether this car is targeted for our low or medium income grp but let’s say it’s for medium income grp (executives). Now let’s say that u are in the ‘medium’ income grp earning average salary say around RM3k (more than a fair figure i think). Are u aware that the car that is targeted for your grp is priced at around 13-14 months of your full salary?? Meaning, if u live on food stamps, enjoy free electricity, free water, free petrol, free house and what not.. u have to work for 14 months and used ALL your income to pay for an ‘affordable’ car.

Now, MyVi is priced around £8k in the UK. The avg monthly salary cross-sector for an executive in UK for 2008 is around £3300 but let’s take it at £3k. That means, if they are to buy a MyVi, that’s only around 2 and a half month of salary!!! U know what car can they buy in order for them to spend 13-14 months equivalent of their salary?? A BMW 5 SERIES!!! U think this income grp in the UK will spend that much portion of their income on a BMW?? No way!! cause it makes no sense to them!!! Yet us Malaysian are gladly paying that much portion of our monthly income for a MyVi!!!

Here’s a quote from TopGear about Proton, “We don’t know what Malaysian motorists did to upset the gods, but it must have been something pretty serious, judging by the punishment they seem to be getting. Still, at least the domestic audience thinks this stuff is the norm – what on earth do they think they’re doing bringing it to the UK? Walk away.”

Bare in mind that the executives in the UK and Malaysia have almost the same job description and education background. I might be wrong here.. or i might be crazy.. but the way i see this.. we are fucked up beyond recovery…

I don’t know about you ppl, but i really don’t want to live my whole life paying for a average quality car… so… NO THANK YOU TO NEW CAR!!! yyyyiissshhhhh…… (at least all this typing works better than coffee)

It’s been 2 years since i wrote anything here.  It’s not that life has been any better, it’s just that i’ve managed to find distractions along the way.  So what’s wrong today that make me turn to this page? Actually nothing… hehe.. In fact i’m still the same person; lazy to write & allergic to reading.  But… i just realised something today that require me to blog.. preferably somewhere with limited audience.  Since my facebook is fill up with friends that has “you have 30+ friends in common” status, this seems like a better place.. hehehe..

I just recalled a joke told by my ex boss, Joe Carlos.  I love listening to his jokes cause he tells it so well and never failed to make me lol.  Now not many people in this world has the ability to make me lol.  Even though i haven’t meet everyone in world, i believe those i know represent a solid sample.  The joke he told me is something like the following.

A student conducted a survey on how often men have sex based on their age group.  So, the first guy he asked was somewhere in his 20s.   The guy proudly answered “oh well… around 3-4 times a week” (I was laughing already at this point cause that sounds about right… hahaha. my ex boss was in his 40s btw).  Now the second guy the student asked the question was in his 40s and he answered “well… about once a week during a good month” (and i was laughing at my boss).  Now the third man was in his 70s and the student was a bit reluctant at first to ask him the question for the fear that it might offend the ‘uncle’.  But to his surprise, the uncle put on a big grin on his face and happily answered “once a year”.  Puzzled by the reaction, he asked again.. “Uncle… i’m sorry, but why u look so happy?” and the uncle answered with a bigger grin on his face, “Well, tonite is the nite!”.  hehehe…

Now… here’s the fuck up part.  Today, i just realised that sex has turn into an annual event for me as well!! hahaha…. and i’ve adjusted to it.  The only different with me and the uncle is i don’t have a fixed date for it. hehe.. Even though, i still have about 2 and half months to go to improve the statistic, the odds doesn’t look promising at all.  William Hill Bookmaker would probably rate me at 20 to 1.  But it’s all good, i always can reactivate my World of Warcraft account in case i need extra distraction.. hehehe…

Regards.

It has come to my attention that my blog is actually rather
depressing. It’s as if life is really bad. Well, actually it’s not. It’s just
that when i’m even slightly happy, i want to reap every single second of the
happiness and blogging just takes too much time out of it.

If you happened to be from a successful family, u wouldn’t
really experience much (not none,
just not as much) of the hard part of life. I’m not saying that my family is a
failure either. I have a good family. In fact, I probably have better family
than half of the Malaysian population and for that i’m grateful. I’m grateful
enough that i’m not living under a bridge somewhere sticking needle into my
arms. U don’t have to be that smart to figure this out, but if someone come
home to a bridge, chances are, their family is fucked up.

There is very little chance or none at all for us to see
these unfortunate people write a blog. But, if that ever happened, you will see
how my depressing moments are really child’s play. It’s totally a different
league. Sometimes ‘fucked up family’ is a heritance,
there’s really nothing much you can hope for if your dad or even grand dad is
homeless. Now, this is my excuse for being single and not looking. It’s simply
not appropriate for me to breed for the time being. Well ok… the ’single and
not looking’ part, that’s bullshit, I still look, i just don’t want to go near
any. Alrite…alrite… that’s bullshit too, sometimes i’m a little closer, but
i just don’t want to keep any. Oh.. fuck you… ok.. I want to keep some, i just
can’t afford any… happy now?

Do you have any idea how hard it is to wake up every single
fucking day and attempt self-motivation? If you do, then u probably understands
what the hell my blog is all about. At some point, the steam up your head is
just too hot and you need to let go some. This is called sharing your fucking
problem. If you are married or seeing someone, you can talk to them unless
they’re the problem (now that could be worst cause you probably can’t blog
either..). If u’re from a ’successful’ family, you could just spend some money
somewhere and that works too plus it also helps the economy. If you’re single
and broke my friend… this (blogging) may be your last chance before your head
explode. I just want to share with someone and i don’t even give a fuck who i’m
sharing it with and no response is required either. I’m just glad that it’s out
of my fucking head. It doesn’t even matter if no one reads it, cause as far as
i’m concerned it’s on the Internet and the word ‘inter’ is good enough for me.
How’s this for a reason for having a depressing blog, it’s not just whinning,
it’s free therapy.

Have a nice day now… My best regards to you and…
life could be good today.

See that blue bike in my gallery?? Well… i crashed it
yesterday. Not really sure what happened, i kinda lost consciousness for 30 min
with no idea what happened prior to that. It’s either I felt down on my own or
someone knock me from behind – I have no idea. It must have happened around
3.30pm, that’s all I can remember… It all felt like a bad dream, and the next
thing I knew, I’m in UH.

Nothing really major… few stitches on my right eyebrow, few stitches
to my lower lip, road rash on my left, right arm, and face. I’m able to walk by
now, nothing physically broken, though my right eye still bleeding at the
time I’m typing this. Uploaded the photo already. 

Anyway… I would like to thank everyone who helped and the
Firemen who sent me to UH, the doctors and nurses who took care of me for a few
hours.. Ferhan for coming to c me. Marlin and Nisa too… and Chot for telling
them. Andrew and the rest from SFB for making arrangement to pick up my bike.
My family who were extremely concerned and worried. And of course I’m grateful
to Alllah s.w.t. It really could have been worst…

No one likes to admit it, but that’s the actual fact. We even lied to ourselves on a constant
basis.

No one likes being lied to. However, if you don’t know you’re being lied to, it’s absolutely fine. But, once you found out that it’s a lie, it’s
more often offending than amusing. To
me, it’s insulting in many ways.  It’s like making a statement “Mmm… This person
is so dumb, I’m sure I can trick him and get away with it.”

It’s a terrible thing to give a false hope.  When a person put so much faith and trusts in
another person (especially a friend), it’s utterly disappointing when those
values were betrayed.  You can’t help but
feels insignificant. Now, feeling insignificant
to strangers is not as devastating as feeling insignificant to people who you
thought are your friends. Even when you truly
are insignificant to anyone, you just don’t like being reminded about it.   

So please, if any of my friends happen to read this, the next
time you want to lie to me, put some effort into it. Please lie well… and make that another PROMISE!!

 
Best Regards,
ArmRule

Sunday, Jan 29, 1.04am

At the time of writing this, i’m not sure whether i’m absolutely furious or absolutely sad.. I’m feeling the anger boiling inside but i’ve yet to break anything. It’s a good thing that it’s already a Sunday though i seriously doubt that one day will be enough to bounce back from this.

The 29th seems to be a cursed date. Broke up on Sept 29th and today is an exact rewind, with the same character but a slightly different script. Regardless, it hurts as bad. How could i let myself be so weak and so FUCKING STUPID! Shame on me..

Loneliness is terible thing. Make your heart soft and your brain  useless. All I did wrong was ‘hoping’. Hoping that she had changed. Hoping that there is a future for us somewhere. Hoping that i was wrong the first time, or the second time and even the third time.. Hoping that 2006 will be the year. It turn out that it’s just a different number after the zero compared to few weeks back..

I had a few ppl asking the infamous "how’s life?" question to me this week. Most of the times, this simple question will be followed by a very simple answer; "Good!". But… i’m kinda sick of saying something just to avoid more questions; "What happened? or what’s wrong?" is the most likely to be the next one on the list.

So…here i am whining about the ‘not so good’ life that i’m having right now. On the ‘Good life’ scale i’m probably at 2/10 and it could only get worst.

Ok…From this point onwards, if u’re below 18 or a family member, i think u should really stop reading!

To begin with, i’ve gone monk for 58 days!! U need to be old enuf (i told u to leave u stupid fuck!) and smart enuf to understand or how severe the situation is! Right now… I don’t think i give a fuck any more (how ironic)..

On top of that, business is bad! Struggling to stay afloat. I’m totally out of capital and cash flow problem could be a real bitch! It’s even more depressing when every single customer has to ask the "how’s business?" question. Of course the standard answer is "OKlah…" (with a grin). Bills are driving me crazy!! Had outstanding bill of RM3600 for electricity alone!! That’s RM700-900/month on avg and RM1200 for July alone if i’m not mistaken. I mean what the FUCK??!! It’s not like i’m running a fucking factory over here. A bloody shop selling lights must have pay less than me! And it’s not that i haven’t been paying at all. Apparently, the ESTIMATED reading was VERY much lower and i’ve been getting the estimated reading for 3 months before somebody decide to skip sending bill and send me the total ACTUAL reading a month later and fuck me up left right upside down!! Maderfak!! I did request for a new meter, and I was allowed to make 2 payments via cheque (15 days gap). I don’t have much choice and it’s not like i can run on batteries and candles are too gothic. The first cheque was painfully ok, and the second one was dated 17 Nov. I’m expecting some payment from my golf coaching classes which would really help out with the second payment but..this is a whining. There’s some delay with the payment hence the bounced cheque. That’s just fucked up!

Few days later, the hand phone got barred and the internet connection too. That’s on the same fucking day!! BITCH!! I need both back, it’s kinda rude not to reply to customer’s sms and kedaimotor.com (my shop & website) would not sounds very good without me having access to the internet. While i’m at it, took care HALF of the astro bill too. I don’t want to end up talking to myself the whole week.

Just before the raya, my bike was finally ready after more than 4 months in the workshop. At one stage, from my visit to the workshop, they practically turned it to a fucking shelf!! The initial estimated repair cost was around RM2500..but ppl really need to learn estimating better - the final bill was RM5500!! Oh man…. i was totally screwed. The bike was kinda my last hope for happiness, before i sell my soul to the devil eventhough i doubt that worth much. So…there i was (on the 10th), cutting a deal with the workshop (had a good relationship with em). Submitted my bike registration card to them which is equivalent to taking a bike loan to purchase one. It was worth it! At least for a while.. One week of pure freedom before it started making funny noises… come to think of it, it wasn’t funny at all. Back to the workshop again last Monday and the misery continues..

There’s so much more i want to let out, but beeing a guy, i think i’ve totally exceeded my words limit for today; cursed and decent. As for now… the morale of the story is, as stated in my previous blog, men’s major problems are usually related only to two things; women or money.

Regards,
Keeping the faith (extremely hard).

27th Oct 2005, 0636hrs

Unless u’re gay, men’s major problems are usually related only to two things; women or money. I got issues with both…

What a terrible October. Can’t wait for u to FUCK OFF!! I’m running out off depressing song to listen to already..

Oct 1 2005, 1410hrs

In my opinion, people starts writing when they are lonely. For me, this is where i begin…